In a funk? Read this

I know, I know. This blog was originally created to be more fashion-oriented, but deep down I think it’s supposed to be about so much more than that. I have this deep-rooted desire to share things that go beyond my latest favorite fashion finds. Don’t get me wrong, fashion is lyfe and finding affordable ways to keep up with trends is a passion of mine. But I also have another passion, and that’s sharing the nitty gritty that comes with being a 20-something year old.

Lately I have been in a sort of funk. I have a lot going on, and I’m the type of person who gets easily overwhelmed. I’m a creature of habit and like to keep everything in its own little compartment of my brain. But when you have about a million things happening at once, that becomes difficult. Don’t get me wrong, these are all good things. They are actually great things. But being the introverted, very very lowkey person that I am, I have trouble mentally dealing with all of it. I get overwhelmed, and then I go into my little shell.

I’ve had to really open up and learn how to navigate my way through life changes and mental/emotional growth spurts. My “funks” are usually a direct result of my inability to deal with life, no matter how good or bad it may be. This may sound crazy, but it’s true. Sometimes, I just don’t know how to deal. I’m human, and in my experience, my 20s have been the hardest and most rewarding years of my life. A lot goes on in your 20s. You grow up, you meet new people, you learn what kind of relationships work for you, you learn what you like and don’t like, and hopefully, you learn how to express all of that.

Here are a few ways that I get out of a funk and enjoy everything life has to offer — good or bad:

Embrace change ­– We are always changing, but I think your 20s are when some pretty big changes take place. You are looking for or have found a long-term job. You are really, truly on your own in the world. You’re learning how to handle money and what it means to make a living. Your navigating your way through relationships. I think you really come into your own in your 20s, but that can only happen if you embrace every change that is thrown your way. Learn what works for you and what doesn’t, and know that it’s okay to feel uncomfortable and out of place for a little while. With change comes growth, and with growth comes a new appreciation for life.

Don’t force yourself into relationships just to avoid being lonely – I think there’s unnecessary pressure for 20-somethings to find “the one” and settle down. Don’t let that influence your decisions and relationships. Being lonely is a gift, and once you do settle down, it’s a gift you don’t get to enjoy nearly as much. Know that it’s totally fine to be single and doin’ your own thing for as long as you want. No one is judging you or putting a timeline on your life, and if they are, ignore them.

Learn what works for you and how to express that – During our teens and early 20s, we are constantly listening to what other people tell us to do and what other people think is right for our lives. But once you hit 25 or so, you get to really experiment with all the things you’ve been told and find out what works for you. Listen to your intuition. If you grew up running track and actually hate running, stop. If you think you have to get a certain job to be successful, but that job holds no interest for you, try something else. What works for you doesn’t have to work for anyone else, and it doesn’t even have to make others happy. It just has to make you happy.

Don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself – This is something that has taken me 27 years to learn how to do. Confrontation freaks me out, and standing up for myself is terrifying. But you know what? It’s worth it. It took me 27 years to find the confidence to stand up for myself, mostly because before now, I felt like I didn’t have much to stand up for. I was always doing what others told me was right. Standing up for yourself requires you to know your truth and do the hard things. And, as a late bloomer in this aspect, it’s about damn time.

Spend time alone – Take yourself to a movie. Treat yourself to a solo dinner. Go get a mani and pedi alone. This used to freak me out, but it’s so important. Get comfortable with yourself. Get to know yourself. Soon enough you may have a husband and kids and a big, busy life, and you’ll long for time alone. Take advantage of being in your 20s and having time. And use some of that time to be alone and be okay with it.

 

XO

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